My Mirror

"I'll be your mirror
 Reflect what you are, in case you don't know
 I'll be the wind, the rain and the sunset
 The light on your door to show that you're home . . ." - The Velvet Underground

You get what you give. The Universe reflects what you want to see.

All of these things may be true. I religiously believed these things until my mother got sick with cancer and died. I  never pleaded with God so much than the times when I cried in the bathroom at the hospital while we waited for a doctor to give us miracualous news.

It never happened. It changed me. 

I still believe thoughts are powerful and I still believe in positive thinking, but I also believe that some things are out of our control.

A few months ago Callan and I adopted a puppy. Mostly things are great, but the housetraining is tough. I'm supremely aware that everything Rya (our puppy) does or doesn't do is a result of her training. It's a reflection of what we've taught her.

So today we took Rya to her our first obedience class and I was in a bad mood as the class started. We went through commands. She was distracted, which is to be expected of a 6 month old puppy in a new environment with other dogs, but I was also distracted due to my bad mood and negative thoughts.

I constantly feel distracted. I'm always running around and thinking about my next task. "I have to do this" and "I should do this" are constant thoughts in my head. Neurotic Nelly, my gremlin, rearing her worrisome little head.

I never thought it could rub off on our puppy so easily. I've noticed when I am calm and present while training Rya, she is right there with me. When we're impatient and distracted, she's the same. Rya is our mirror. Pets reflect the energy of their owners.

But it gets bigger. We also mirror our parents. Our children mirror us. Our friends reflect our personalities. Our choices reflect our values. Our society reflects our beliefs and it gets bigger and bigger until it's incomprehnsible, but it's all connected. And we're all so important.

And maybe my prayers were heard in the bathroom and the mirror just reflected what had to be. Out of my control, but not out of my sight.