Happy Holidays!

Greetings!

No, I haven't forgotten about my blog. I've just been busy with all the joys of the season including: family, friends, shopping and taking an expedited business/entrepreneur class at a local college.

I will surely be writing more very soon. Happy Holidays to all!

'Til next time,
AC

Ghosts of Jobs Past: Post-College, Year One

Living in New York City had been a dream of mine since I was a little girl. After I graduated from college, I became obsessed with moving there. When people would ask me about post-graduation plans, I’d routinely tell them that I was going to move to NYC after graduation. What I’d be doing there was something I’d figure out eventually. I just wanted to live! (God, I was such an English major! I was so driven . . .and so naive.)

I scored an interview with a recruitment agency in Manhattan. I packed up my car with the hopes of never returning to a boring suburban Maryland existence again!

A few days later, I came back to Maryland feeling defeated. The interview went well, but I was not promised a job. About a few weeks after that, I landed an internship in Manhattan with the help of my older brother. 

A word about internships: 

Internships are fantastic. Internships act as real glimpses into the working world, as well as excellent resume builders. Unfortunately, they are normally unpaid and thus reserved for the economically advantaged or suuuuuuper-motivated. I never understood the benefits of an internship until I graduated from college and started looking for a job. My internship seemed to impress potential employers even more so than my college degree!

However, internships are not entirely realistic for students who need to earn an income while they are in school. I never took an internship while I was in college (or graduate school) because I had to work.

All this being said, if it’s possible to complete an internship, it’s worth it.

Adrienne as Publicity/Marketing Intern

I interned at the Mayor’s Office of Film, Theatre and Broadcasting. It was great working with the media and I enjoyed helping with major events throughout NYC. I worked, unpaid, from 8am - 5pm, 3 days a week. It was intense.

I had to make money somehow. I had a tough time finding part-time employment while interning. I ended up signing with a nanny service, but I didn’t have any luck. (That experience could have its own blog post!) 

Here are ways that I stayed afloat during these times: 

• My generous and wonderful cousin allowed me to stay with her for free. 
• I sold my car. 
• I borrowed money from my annoyed and confused parents. 
• I had to sneak on a Metro North train without paying . . . and I got caught. (My kind uncle had to pick me up in Westchester County somewhere.) 

I was a stressed, broke-ass mess. I cried one day because I couldn’t afford a smoothie from Jamba Juice. To be fair, the smoothie was supposed to be my lunch.

My brief time “working” in Manhattan was a great experience and opened so many doors, but it was hard as hell. 

Adrienne as Creative Marketing Associate 

What started out so sweet (my first REAL job with benefits!), ended with me crying in my supervisor’s office and handing her a resignation letter. To put it nicely, it was a very difficult learning experience. 

My position consisted of marketing junk mail to senior citizens. It was awful. I was depressed. I hated my job. After a couple of weeks, I didn’t even try. I felt so helpless and alone. I was/am so dramatic. 

It just wasn’t the right fit. I didn’t get along with my manager and I didn’t agree with the company’s mission. I didn’t feel like I had any input in our marketing efforts and I didn’t really care. 

When I started this series of posts about the ghosts of jobs past, I thought I’d share some juicy details about this job, but now I don’t know if including these details are relevant to my overall story.

I’m all for a good laugh at the expense of myself, but I don’t like talking shit for talking shit’s sake and that’s what I’d be doing if I spilled any details about my time with this unnamed company. I am fully aware of the fact that the purpose of these posts is to re-examine my past job experiences, but I think I've said enough about this job.

I’ve learned from my mistakes and I’m moving on.

Still to come:  930 Club, Freelancing 1.0, and 1913412440941409 Part-time Jobs! 

What is Old is New Again

Today I am re-visiting an article that I wrote in March of 2008 during the Democratic Presidential Primary race. Please read it here.

Since this article was written, not only did Barack Obama defeat Hillary Clinton in the primaries, he also became President of the United States. I am going to write a follow-up that will describe what I think about the racial undertones (or overtones) that have shaded his presidency.  I'm curious to hear what you all think about race and whether or not President Obama is the victim of racism or racialism. Please share your thoughts in the comments section of this post!

A few years ago, I received an e-mail stating that this article was being studied in a class about post-racialism. I was excited that my writing could contribute to a fascinating discussion, as nothing thrills me more than when people "get" something out of my writing.

In other news, I'm still working on my blog post about employment after my first year of college. It was such a hard time for me and it's even hard for me to sit down to write about it. I hope to have it up in the next couple of days.

Have a great day!

Ghosts of Jobs Past: The College Years

I had wonderful job experiences during my college years. So wonderful, in fact, that I barely planned what kind career I’d have once I graduated. I assumed it would work itself out. During college, I was too busy trying to keep my head afloat with school and personal matters. I graduated with an English degree and career options were never discussed in any course. I was clueless.

Now, let’s go back to 2002 when I entered my freshman year at Drexel University . . .

Adrienne as Work/Study Student

Upon moving to Philadelphia to study music business at Drexel University, I decided that I needed a part-time job. I liked making money and, after my lucrative summer job, I couldn’t imagine not having an income. I qualified for work/study, so I got a job monitoring the practice rooms in the music department.  

I soon grew restless and a friend of mine suggested that I work at the library with her as a circulation assistant. I loved this job and a career in librarianship was suggested by my supervisor. I politely declined and thought it sounded like the most boring career ever. I was too busy trying to become a rock star, or, at the very least, manager of a rock band and girlfriend of a rock star. I had no time for libraries. 

Ironic, I know. Who could have known that years later I would go to library school.

Adrienne as Lawyer’s Assistant

I left Drexel after my freshman year because I wasn’t happy there and, for me, it was not worth $38,000 (!!!!) per year. I transferred to a community college for a semester while I tried to figure out my next move. I applied to NYU and auditioned for their music business school, but I didn’t get in. If I was smarter, I would have applied to their English department, but I had vague notions of still being involved in the entertainment field. At this point, I wanted to become an entertainment lawyer. 

After I didn’t get into NYU, I decided that I’d study English at the University of Maryland. Around that time, I also landed a job as an assistant to a lawyer. I worker with the lawyer for about two or three years. I was good at my job and I really liked my boss. I learned a lot about the legal profession - mainly that I didn’t want to become a lawyer.

I also took care of her dogs. She had two pugs, Mugsy and Buddah, and a cute little white mutt named Gizmo. One day I witnessed a sexual act between the two pugs that resulted in puppies a few months later. It was the most traumatizing/cute thing I’d ever witnessed in my life. Well, the resulting puppies were cute, not the dog sex.

Adrienne as Babysitter

My best friend loves all babies and children. I like babies and children, but not all of them. Actually, I like SOME babies and children. No, more accurately, I like A FEW babies and children. (These include my nieces, nephews, cousins and other random children I’ve encountered.)

Anyway, one day I met my friend for coffee and she brought along two adorable little girls. They had great personalities and were well-behaved. They let us chat about life and boys while listening patiently. The girls told me that their mom had written a book and dedicated it to them. I thought that was super cool. They were pleasant and fun. 

A few weeks later, my friend told me that they needed a babysitter during the week. I liked the girls and the pay was decent, so I thought I’d give it a try.  It was worth the half hour drive from my apartment. I ended up babysitting for them, off and on, for four or five years. 

I learned a lot during this time. I bonded with them and began to think differently about becoming a parent one day.  I began to think of my own childhood as well. I babysat for a few other kids in their neighborhood, but I never quite enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed babysitting my two little buddies.

Side note: Taking care of kids is EXHAUSTING. It’s far more tiring than sitting in front of a computer all day. Much respect to caregivers and stay-at-home moms!

I don’t think I was the best babysitter because I’m not that great at discipline and I’m a bit of a pushover. My saving grace, and favorite part of the job, is that I have a vivid imagination and can relate to kids. I enjoy being silly and creative. This experience meant a lot more to me personally than professionally.

Their mother is a writer and has given me great advice about my writing career and other professional decisions. She felt maternal towards me and worried about my plans (or lack thereof) at times. I could sense that she knew how scary post-college life could be and tried to warn me.

Boy, was she right. 

Up next: The First Year After College

Ghosts of Jobs Past: Pre-College Jobs

“Your work is to discover your world and then with all your heart give yourself to it.” - Gautama Siddharta, the founder of Buddhism

I am currently going through a major career overhaul. I'm re-thinking my approach to employment. While navigating this journey, I find myself thinking about jobs that I’ve had in the past. I hope not to make the same mistakes that I’ve made before. At 27, I am exhausted by my inability to find a lucrative job, or career, that I like enough to stick with for longer than a couple of years.

I am obsessed with recognizing a pattern so that I can break the cycle. What better way to do so than to examine these experiences by writing them down?

The next few blog posts will explore my winding road of employment history. Hopefully, no future employers stumble upon my website. (Or maybe this will serve as healthy full disclosure.)

First up: pre-college jobs.

Adrienne as Cashier 

My first “real” job was as a cashier at Target during the summer between my 10th and 11th grade year of high school. I had just turned 16 and decided I wanted to make enough money to save for a car.

I remember very few things about this job. These things include:

• Brad Pitt and Jennifer Anniston’s wedding picture graced the cover of People Magazine during this time and I looked at the cover everyday for a week. 
• I got the CD Make Yourself by Incubus for free because I sold a Target credit card. (This album influenced my life in many ways as an angsty teenager.) 
• I remember a customer wearing a beautiful engagement ring that I absolutely adored. I told her I hoped to have one just like it one day. She said that I would. 
• I didn’t save a penny towards my car. Each paycheck was spent by buying things at Target.

In August, my family decided to rent a house at the beach. A few days before we were due to leave, I requested time off and my supervisor told me that I could not have off and that it was too short of notice because the schedule had already been set.

Of course, giving notice is pretty basic stuff, but I couldn’t fathom not being able to go on vacation with my family! What in the hell was I supposed to do?

“So, what if I HAVE to take off?” I asked, genuinely not understanding the concept of being told that I could not go on vacation.

“I don’t know what to tell you. You can’t just go on vacation without notice when you have a job. You have to let us know beforehand,” my very patient supervisor explained.

Now, to be fair, my mom had explained to me that there might be a problem with requesting off, but I was determined to make it happen. I really felt as though I had no choice in the matter and simply had to have off. I think the family trip was rather spontaneous and I had the option of staying at home with my dad for a few days, but I wanted to go to the beach!

Also, it was the end of summer and school was starting soon. I planned on ending my job a week or so after I got back from vacation anyway. Of course, I hadn’t told my supervisors about that either.

“Well, I don’t think this is going to work out. What would happen if I just can’t work here anymore?” I inquired.

My supervisor, again with disturbing patience, explained: “Well, if you quit without notice, then you may not be able to work at Target again in the future.”

“So I cannot even quit without giving two weeks notice?” I asked incredulously.

“I don’t plan on working for Target again anyway so that doesn’t seem like reason enough for notice,” I reasoned with myself.

I don’t remember the exact words that I used to quit my job at Target. I do remember my mom picking me up after work. I don’t remember her reaction exactly, but it probably included her favorite statement, often compounded with a sigh, that she used to respond to something irreversible that her children had done: “Oh well.”

Looking back, I know I had so much to learn. I don’t think I truly understood or respected the concept of employment. At the time, I believed that jobs were simply ways that my parents and other adults made a living. You just had a job. I never delved more deeply into the concept of a career until many years later.

During the next 11 years of my life, I would grow very accustomed to leaving jobs.

Adrienne as Supply/Mailroom Clerk 

My next memorable job occurred the summer after high school graduation. At the suggestion of my mother, I decided to try finding a job through a temporary employment agency. I was offered a temporary position for the summer as a supply/mailroom clerk at Lockheed Martin.

Working in a room with no window for 40 hours a week proved to be a boring and depressing summertime existence. I worked full-time and made lots of money for an 18-year-old, but I was miserable. I spent every day alone in a room with a fax machine, copier, computer and office supplies. I was chained to my desk. My mom and I met for lunch one day in the cafeteria (she worked for IBM in an adjoining office building) and I vowed never to work in an office again. She admitted that it wasn’t for everyone.

This was also my first experience working with grown-ass women who acted like they were in high school.

Occasionally, I had to cover the phones in the call center. This was exciting because I was able to socialize with a few boisterous and entertaining middle-aged women. I really bonded with a Jamaican woman who had an obsession with Janet Jackson. Her and I would talk about pop culture and our favorite new show, American Idol.

A woman who worked in another department, but was friendly with the call center ladies, would stop by the call center to gossip and chat. She kept telling me that I looked EXACTLY like her daughter. One fateful day she showed me a picture of her daughter (my "twin").

 I didn’t think I looked anything like her. I guess the look on my face said it all. I really hadn’t meant to offend her, but I could sense a coldness from her immediately after she showed me the picture.

One afternoon, a few days later, she came into the call center with leftover beverages from a luncheon. She asked everyone, except for me, if they wanted a soda. Once she left the room, my Jamaican buddy asked why I didn’t get anything. I told her that I wasn’t offered.

An hour or so later, the woman came back. My Jamaican ally boldly confronted the woman: “Why you ignore Adrienne and not offer her a drink? You don’t even acknowledge her. Are you mad ‘cause she don’t think she look like your daughter? Well, she don’t look a ting like her! What’s wrong with that? No excuse for your behavior to that girl.”

The woman was caught off-guard and apologized for her behavior. She asked if I wanted a soda, but I declined.

I realized that maybe I should have just smiled and politely agreed that I looked like her daughter. Or I could have said that she was beautiful, but I don't really see the resemblance. Lesson learned.

This experience taught me some key elements to workplace environments: always be aware of your reactions and always be diplomatic.

Also, it sucks working in rooms with no windows.

This wouldn’t be the last time I dealt with office politics or catty women. Fortunately, it also wouldn’t be the last time I had strong and sensible women to call out the cattiness.

But, more on that later.

Next up: The College Years

The Destination

Writing online content with the goal of earning money is very fickle.

I have researched search engine optimization (SEO) techniques for Google and implemented it on the sites I write for, but Google keeps changing their algorithms. I'd argue that Google updating and changing their algorithms is a good thing because it allows users to retrieve relevant and quality content faster, but it makes things a little difficult for content writers and website designers who base their income on SEO.

According to this article, in order to optimize Google rankings, content creators and website designers must focus on the following:

• Design for Engagement and User Experience
• Spelling and Grammar are Important
• Focus on Content Quality
• Avoid Too Many Ads
• Avoid Duplicate Content
• Less is More
• Ensure High-Quality Code

Excellent advice for all who create and re-design websites for SEO. However, I write for sites that have their own design and other aspects of their site that I cannot control. Thus, when Google changes their algorithms, I just have to cross my fingers.

Well, last month, this affected me a lot. My income went down 75% on the sites I write for. It happened previously in the summer of 2010. I do not depend on the money I make from web content writing as much as other people, but it's enough to make me second guess whether or not this is a reliable income at all. I question whether it's even worth the time to write for other sites anymore. I will continue to do so when it moves me, but I think my efforts are better spent elsewhere.

I enjoy blogging and will continue to blog about my writing adventures frequently. Where and when I choose to publish articles online is still up in the air. 

Right now I am focusing my efforts on looking for salaried employment whether it be in the field of writing, education or some other promising prospect. I'm becoming quite restless without a job and a steady income.

I will continue to do what makes me happy and conduct my affairs, personally and professionally, in the same way. 

I haven't forgotten about the importance of the journey and the destination.

"Everyday is a winding road,

I get a little bit closer.

Everyday is a faded sign,

I get a little bit closer to feeling fine . . ."

- Sheryl Crow

Here's an old article that I wrote about the Do's and Don'ts to Avoiding Holiday Weight Gain.

I only wrote it because I gained about 10 pounds by Thanksgiving that year and had to get a grip on my weight during the holidays. Eeek.

Under the Weather

I just ordered The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. 

That in itself is pretty unremarkable and probably doesn't warrant it's own post, but I am posting about it anyway. My brother Chris told me about this book and recommended it a while ago. He says it has been extremely influential and life-changing.

I'm feeling pretty crappy today. Throat is sore and I feel very weak and achey. Whenever I feel like this, which happens a few times a year and usually during a season change, I load up on the vitamin C, meds and relaxation for a day. That's what I'm doing right now.

But should I be writing anyway? The answer to a question is usually in the question, and the answer is that I know that I should be writing. I guess that's what I'm doing now, isn't it?

Anyway, if I'm talking the talk, I also gotta walk the walk. If I'm saying I'm a writer and this is my passion and blahblahblahwhateverblahblahblah, then I must OWN IT! I'm gonna WORK it. I'm going to get out there and strut my stuff like it's my damn job. Hallelujah!

Okay, sorry about that. Got a little carried away. Stick with me . . .

My revelation about walking the walk goes back to me ordering The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. 

I just read a review on Amazon that says the following about the book:

"Habit 1 discusses the importance of being proactive. Covey states that we are responsible for our own lives; therefore, we possess the initiative to make things happen. He also points out that proactive people should (sic) not blame various circumstances for their behaviors but they realize behavior comes from one's conscious. (?) Covey also explains that the other type of person is reactive. Reactive people are affected by their social as well as physical surroundings. This means that if the weather is bad, then it affects their behavior such as their attitude and performance."

I find myself being reactive a lot lately. I know that I'm going through a tough time and have been for the past year, but there is no excuse anymore. I'm tired of being reactive. I used to pride myself in my proactivity and I realize that I've slipped up a bit. I'm going to work on it. I'm going to take control of myself and my future again.

If you know me at all, you know that one of my favorite mantras is the following: You cannot control everything that happens to you, but you CAN control your actions and reactions. 

I am excited to read this book and get some serious motivation. Good self-help books are like brain food. It's always good to add another good, nutritious meal to your repertoire.

On a related note, I just re-watched Bill Cunningham New York on Netflix with Callan. If you want motivation for any passion, see that documentary. Simply amazing.

Writer/Whatever

Even bestselling authors have a side job.

Some, like showcased in the link above, open up cute little antique boutiques. Some decide to teach English or become professors. Some, like Harper Lee, publish one masterpiece and then stop writing. 

What does this have to do with me, you ask?

Well, let's just put it out there, I am not choosing to write for the money. That's stupid. Who would WANT this lifestyle by choice? I feel like as hard and lofty as my goals may seem, I have no choice. I know what I love and what makes me happy. There is no choice about what I am going to do . . .there's just the choice in HOW I am going to do it.

I need a steady income; I have rent and bills to pay. I haven't had a full-time job since August. After my mom passed away, I decided to give myself some much needed time and did so by walking away from an epically shitty and demanding job (buy me a drink and I'll tell you all about it) that I should have left a long time ago. I took this break with the vague notion that eventually I'd have to "get back on the horse" and find another job, hopefully less shitty on the shitty job spectrum.

I've always had my foot in the door of web content writing. I've published articles off and on since early 2008, but I've never made enough money in one month to even cover filling my gas tank. Sad, but true. I knew that I'd have to find a job to supplement my income while I worked on writing. The problem remains, what kind of job? 

I know the baseline income I need to make each month. I know that sitting in front of a computer in an office is not something I enjoy or am particularly good at. I know that I love working with people and helping others. I know that I like autonomy and responsibility. I love working in a positive work environment with people that feel like family.

I get a little touchy when people question my plans and ask me about money. It isn't like I am clueless and naive. I've done my research (I'm a trained librarian . . .) and I know this road is not easy. As I've said before, I really have no choice.

Right now I am continuing to focus efforts on writing and getting my name out there. I am also focused on finding a part-time or full-time position that can supplement and support my writing. I'd love to teach adults, but right now is not the time for me to go back to school for another degree. 

Whatever happens, I can go to sleep at night knowing that I've tried my best. Just because I am not able to make a living by my pen at present does not mean that I will never make a living by my pen. It just means that I need to revise a little.

I leave you with an inspirational quote from my mom: "Fake it 'til you make it, girlfriend." 

A "Good" Writer

"Talent is cheaper than table salt. What separates the talented individual from the successful one is a lot of hard work." - Stephen King

I'm a writer, but what does being a writer mean?

1. Does it mean being grammatically correct at all times?
2. Does it mean being an awesome speller?
3. Does it mean being able to expertly edit your own stuff?
4. Does it mean that you can simply convey meaning through the written word?
5. Does it mean being published?
6. More specifically, does it mean being published in print and not just online?

I have been told that I am a good writer. I know that I enjoy writing and that it has always been a hobby and passion. I enjoy creative writing. I enjoy being informative. I'm a storyteller. I'm a communicator.

Although I am an avid reader, I know that my grammar isn't perfect and that I struggle with spelling (spellcheck is a blessing and a curse). I also know that the more I write, the better I become. I have fallen out of touch with serious writing for years, but I'm writing more these days and honing my skills. I know I can get better.

If you are unable to communicate using the written word, then you may not be a good writer. If you have nothing to say, then you're not a good writer.

Editing can make good content into great content, but editing cannot make bad content into great content. Sometimes, though, editing can make great content into not-so great content.

Here are my very humble answers to the above questions:

1. No.
2. No.
3. No.
4. Yes and no.
5. Yes and no. 
6. No. (Wishful thinking?)

Steve Martin explains it best with the following quote:

"The conscious mind is the editor, and the subconscious mind is the writer. And the joy of writing, when you're writing from your subconscious, is beautiful – it's thrilling. When you're editing, which is your conscious mind, it's like torture."

I don't think editing my own work is complete torture, but I dislike it. I am never completely finished editing. I'm impatient and far from a perfectionist which I think helps me a lot. As a productive and successful writer, I don't think that you can be a perfectionist or else you'd go mad. You'd never finish anything.

That being said, I'm publishing this at 5:47am after being up for several hours. I will read this once more before clicking "publish." I may read this again. It all depends on how I feel. 

Man, I need an editor.

Hope on a Sunday Evening

Sometimes I am filled with doubt.

I realize that it is not my job to worry about if I'm doing the right thing or if I'm a "good" writer - my job is to just write. I need to be prolific and I need not be ashamed. I have to market myself, network and WRITE.

I'm refining and refreshing my writing and editing skills. Editing is super important and forces me to work on patience. That means I take the time to print out articles and edit them on paper rather than just on my computer screen. (I have to admit, there is still nothing like print when it comes to catching mistakes and refining the flow of a piece.) That also means waiting a few days between "finishing" a piece and publishing it. Things definitely look different, for better or worse, after 72 hours.  I know that quality content is important. If my name is attached to ANYTHING, it has to be something I am proud of and feel good about.

Right now I am planning my strategy for the upcoming week. I have to query, post more articles and market my writing. The goals remain pretty much the same each week.

It's so tempting to zone out and watch TV or log on to Facebook when I'm supposed to be working. It's also easy to catch up with friends and family when I should be writing or looking for gigs. I am still trying to find balance and discipline in terms of my work schedule. Self-employment is super challenging, but rewarding. Not exactly rewarding in the monetary sense, as of yet, but I'll save that for another day.

So when doubt starts to creep in, I focus on improvement and I visualize success.  I grab the doubt with my hands and mold it into something that looks a lot like hope.

I hope everyone had a lovely Thanksgiving. I certainly did and am totally feeling the Christmas spirit! Love to all!

Social Media and Grief

Here is my latest article on Social Media and Grief.

I mostly believe that social media serves as a positive force in the grieving process. For those who have grieved and used social media, why did you use it and do you believe it helped?

Happy Thanksgiving! Enjoy your holiday and be safe!

An Introduction

How rude of me! I didn't even introduce myself!

Hi, I'm Adrienne.

This is the story of a girl who tried everything she could do to NOT follow her dreams of becoming a writer. That is, everything except, in some way, always knowing that there was nothing else she really wanted to do . . . or was particularly passionate about.

This is the story of a girl who used to read until her eyes hurt; who, as a little girl, would wake up at 6am on a Saturday to write, publish and distribute a neighborhood newsletter; and who wrote and directed her first play at the age of 10 and had it performed in front of her entire elementary school.

This is the story of a girl who took one measly (but very memorable) creative writing class in college and wrote a novel by the time she was 20. However, she threw away the manuscript at some point and lost it forever.

No one knows why she did these things and there is probably more to the story, but it doesn't really matter any longer.

Because now this girl is a woman and she realizes that all we have is right now. Yesterday is in the past and tomorrow is not promised.

Thank you kindly for your time and patience with me.

Guide to Chemically Straightening Black Hair

Check out my latest article: Guide to Chemically Straightening Black Hair